Solutions For Modern L...

Fake Helipads

in
We live about 10 miles from the Silverstone circuit where, today, they're running the British F1 GP. Every year at this time it seems like every bleedin' helicopter in Europe comes to town offering a glorified taxi service. Currently the frequency past my window is about one every minute.

So, I'm going to put up one of my trusted Fake Helipads, wait until one of them lands and copter-jack it. Put the offending item up on eBay and, Bob's your uncle.

Global Tease

in
I'm going to open a franchise chain selling T-Shirts printed with town and place names from all over the world. That way, people could walk around with the words "Nepal", "Tasmania", "London", "New York", "Hong Kong" etc. scrawled accross their chests without having to shell out the cash to actually travel to these places for the purposes of buying the T-shirt.

I do concede that they'll have missed out on the actual travel / holiday gig, of course, but that's over in a flash anyway. What remains is the T-Shirt and the often deep sense of personal acheivement such garments confer upon you when you walk down the street, gliding past passers by who can't stop themselves from nudging their friends as they point at you muttering quietly, "Coo, he's been to Reykjavik. He must be really cool."

Could sell the keyrings too. And the little doll people in traditional dress.